Wednesday, June 22, 2005
Time out in God's Country--My Cottage--How it Helps my Depression
Many of my friends also know I suffer from depression. I have been in another one of my depressions for a few weeks now. Like many I do not do well with stress nor do I do well with worry and that couples with low self feelings cause me to go into a tail spin.
One thing that I have been coming to see as a new pattern for me over the past few years since I became a Christian is that my depressions are becoming shorter lived and further apart. Now this is really a good thing for me. What would I contribute this to the fact that I have faith, trust that when I ask for help from God he is there for me and he will see me through. I mentioned to my best friend upon my arrival home I feel about 40% better than before I left so this is a good start.
When I am at my cottage I am reminded of his wonders and what he can create. I smell, good clean air, no pollution, I see clear blue water, and again no pollution, I see the most beautiful sunsets in the world, I birds sing to me every morning to get me up. I feel so peaceful and serene when I am there. I wish at times I could live in a place like that all year round.
There is no traffic, no rushing around, and life is just a far slower pace than in the city. Now do not get me wrong, I would miss the city tremendously and all my friends, but the minute I see the water on the drive up I start to relax and I seem to get a calmness in and around me that I can not explain. So I am speaking with God these days to ask him how can I get this here in the city and keep it all year round.
God is so amazing that I know he may never completely heal me from my depressions but he is helping to make them far more manageable and I am so grateful for that. With His help and the help of a really good psychiatrist I seem to be managing the best I have in years. He never gives us to much to handle we just get so lost in the time that we allow it to over take us and become to much for us to handle.
Joyce Myers is who I am reading right now and she sure has some really good stuff. I will write on this a little later. For those who get depressed from time to time or suffer like I do, please trust in God and ask him to help you get through it and he will. God will do for others as he is doing for me.
Hopefully after this weekend some more of my stresses will be over and I can really consentrate on feeling better. I just have to keep turning it over to him and beleive my faith in him will bring me to the other side soon.
Alexis
Monday, June 20, 2005
Fighting Cancer: Keeping it consistant
She has made very valid points.
So we are anxious to see how others feel on this topic. I would also like to gather a small poll to send the Cancer Society on this topic please watch for next post to take part in the poll. Thanks
Lex
Friday, June 10, 2005
I participated in the Canadian Cancer Society's Relay for Life back in the Spring of 2001. I remember being put off by the fact that I saw people there smoking - Hello? We're trying to put an end to cancer here? I'm participating in the event again this year - I joined last minute (the event is tonight), so I thought I'd check out their website to get a feel for things.
I found this on the FAQ: Why is there no smoking at the Canadian Cancer Society Relay For Life events? Smoking is strictly prohibited at all Relay For Life events. There is a correlation between the use of tobacco and cancer. Tobacco use causes about 45,000 deaths in Canada each year. The Canadian Cancer Society wants to set a positive example in the area of tobacco control by prohibiting the use of tobacco at events. Smokers are welcome to participate, but they are asked to respect the smoke-free environment. Excellent! Very good call! This is the kind of action the Cancer Society should be taking at their fundraising events to promote a healthy, cancer preventative type of lifestyle.
The other "beef" that I had with the event was that M&M Meats was a sponsor, and provided a char-broiled meaty BBQ for all of the participants. It was very much appreciated I'm sure, but consider that consumption of red meat increases one's risk for colorectal cancer - is a beef-burger BBQ really the most appropriate fare for a cure-for-cancer fundraising event? They didn't even have a veggie burger option - I brown-bagged it.
Taken from the Health Canada: It's Your Health website:
Risk Factors For Colorectal Cancer
Age: the older you are, the more likely you are to develop CRC. Most of those diagnosed are 70 years or older.
Heredity: you are more likely to get CRC if someone in your family, especially your immediate family, has been diagnosed with it.
Diet: a diet high in red meat and low in fruits and vegetables may increase your risk.
Weight: obesity and a lack of physical activity increase the risk.
Alcohol consumption: alcohol, especially beer, may increase your risk. Lower rates of CRC have been found in those who drink no alcohol.
Smoking: smoking also increases your risk.
So, there is no smoking at the Relay for Life, no consumption of alcohol permitted, it's a "Relay" therefore they are advocating an active lifestyle, this is all good. They can't help us with our age or heredity. So why do they goof up so profoundly on the diet portion?
Why can't they provide fresh fruit and salads, and veggie burgers in addition to (if not completely instead of) the bbq'd meat?
I suppose this is something only a vegetarian or person restricting red meat in their diet might notice, so I don't really expect all to agree. Am I being hyper-critical?
Does anyone else think that BBQ'd red meat is somewhat out of place at such an event?
Food for thought...
My Father JHB!
Yesterday was Fathers day. It is a day that some card company probably created to help sales of cards and gifts, but for fun I will Google that to see for sure.
The history of Father's Day goes like, in 1909, Spokane, Washington, Sonora Smart Dodd was listening to a Mother's Day sermon. The lecture inspired her to have a special day dedicated to her father, William Jackson Smart, who had brought her up and her siblings single-handedly after their mother died. She could realize the greatness of her father and wanted to let him know how deeply she was touched by his sacrifices, courage, selflessness and love. She held the first Father's Day celebration on 19th of June 1910, on the birthday of her father. The idea soon caught on and in 1924, President Calvin Coolidge supported the idea of a national Father's Day on the petition sent to him by Dodd on the acceptance of fatherhood. In 1926, a National Father's Day Committee was formed in New York City. However, it was thirty years later that a Joint Resolution of Congress gave recognition to Father's Day. Another 16 years passed before President Richard Nixon established the third Sunday of June as a permanent national observance day of Father's Day in 1972 in the honor of all good fathers that contribute as much to the family as a mother, in their own ways. Even before Dodd came into the picture, Dr. Robert Webb of West Virginia is believed to have conducted the first Father's Day service in 1908 at the Central Church of Fairmont. However, it was the colossal efforts of Dodd, the devoted daughter of the Civil War veteran who refused to remarry for the sake of his six children and took upon himself all the duties, love and care of a mother, that eventually led it to a national observance.
Ok so my thoughts were once again proven wrong. It does however does not surprise me that it took almost 70 years to have the third Sunday of June as a permanent national observance day of Father's Day. That’s government for us.
Well it has only taken me 30 years of my life to understand in my heart that Fathers and Mothers are something we need to cherish for each second we have them, for we never know when they will be taken from us or us from them. That each day they are alive should be their day. We should always be showing them how much we appreciate "their sacrifices, courage, selflessness and love" they give us daily.
What does F . A . T . H . E . R . S . mean:
F Faithful.
A Always there.
T Trustworthy.
H Honoring.
E Ever-loving.
R Righteous.
S Supportive.
I sure was not the golden child. I sure challenged my parents, family and many others to the limits.
I can say today that I have made my amends with my parents and we have a pretty good relationship. We are Faithful to each other toady in ways I never thought I was capable of and my parents are Faithful towards me. We believe in each other and can see how each other have grown and changed. They are Always there for me as I am for them. There was a time they did not tust me nor did I trust them. Today there is total Trust between us. I know and believe we Honour each other for who we are, for both are strengths and weaknesses. That does not mean that life between us is always a bed full of Roses but we talk and work it out. Before the lines of communications were not open, today they are. Parents are to have unconditional Love for their children and today I see the Ever-Loving love they have for me and I cherish it and try the best I can to give it back to them 10 fold. Righteous, I had to look the definition up for this.
1 : acting in accord with divine or moral law : free from guilt or sin
2 a : morally right or justifiable
b : arising from an outraged sense of justice or morality
3 slang : GENUINE, GOOD synonym see MORAL.
So as far as Righteous I would have to say that both my parents are Genuine, Good and have excellent Morals. If I could only develop totally what they have then I would be a Great person like them.
And finally Supportive, well no individual could ask for a more supportive set of parents than I have. They are there for me in every way possible. I have had my share of rough times and they are always there for me. Sometimes there can be a lot of grief and sorrow before some mutual resolution that works for all can arise but in the end my parents are always there and try to the best of their ability to understand my illness. Since it is one you can not see physically it sometimes very trying and difficult for us all, but as a family we get through it.
So for Fathers Day this year I took my card to my father privately away from the rest of my family, thanked him for being my father, hugged him to show him how much I love him and I also verbalized to him how much I love him and appreciate his love and support to me. I shared a few tears, and went to a lovely brunch we as a family had to honour him as our Father.
JHB, Genius, Dad may not be my biological dad but he choice me, he has provide me with all the above mentioned abundantly and so to I Say to yo DAD a Job Well Done. I love you and am very Proud to have you as my Father. HAPPY FATHERS DAY!
Sunday, June 12, 2005
Relay for Life
· Celebrate the Survivors' Victory Lap.
· Be inspired by the Luminary Ceremony.
· As part of your team, take turns walking, running or strolling around a track in a non-competitive relay.
· Stay up all night – and feel great about it.
· Give 12 hours to the fight against cancer – and it could add years to the lives of others.
· Relax and have fun off the track in the tent village.
· Learn about cancer issues and how to reduce your risk of the disease.
I was touched by the survivors lap and the Luminary Ceremony especially when they sang and played the song Amazing Grace. There is a silence that files the air around you as you pray and reflect over your love ones who have been touched by cancer and either won or loose the battle.
2 yrs ago I was unable to attend because of an accident I had but last year I was there to be apart of the event and again only as a spectator. However when I left their, I spoke to my friends, friends daughter and decided I wanted to put together a team for this year.
I was a little slow at getting things together but was able to get a team together and plan for the event. Some of the people on my team have been involved in this for a few yrs and had lots of ideas and input. The other half including myself were involved for the first time.
So first off we had to come up with a team name. DRIVE OUT CANCER. Then we had to decide on how to decorate our campsite and what we wanted to do as far as team outfits. Then we had to come up with some fundraising ideas. Then it is the cancer society’s rules that each person on the team is to be responsible to raise $100, and to sell 2 Luminaries. I am very proud that everyone on my team met that requirement and more. Over all I think our team raised almost $5000, and sold 35 or 40 luminaries. We raised around $150 in the selling of raffle tickets. A job well done.
The most moving part of the evening for me was the support from my family and friends. Several friends whom had never been to this event came out to support me and my team along with supporting my father and a family friend whom are survivors and did the victory lap. My father has certainly had his rough times with his battle of cancer but as of this year he is a fifteen (15) year survivor. Our family friend who also walked the survivors lap is a three (3) year survivor. Personally I have lost relatives and friends to this disease. My mothers parents died of cancer, my uncle is dieing from this disease, my aunt died from this disease, a very dear friend of mine passed away just over a year ago from this disease, 2 of my friends who came out to this event both have lost their husbands to this disease, I have a friend who 3 year old son died from this disease and the list could go on for ever. One of the girls on my team is a survivor of the disease, another lady on my team and her 3 daughters who were also on my team lost their husband and father to this disease.
So we all have our own personal reason why we were here taking part of this great event. Our theme was DRIVE OUT CANCER, and for me this is personal I want to help find the cure before I get this disease or any more of my family get this disease.
What break's my heart watching the survivor’s line up for the victory lap are the young children. This year I must of spotted at least a ½ dozen to a dozen young people walking wearing the blue survivors t-shirt.
As the evening events progressed there were bands playing and then they had open mike where people could sing, dance, tell a joke, a story, or just share what ever they wanted to. Well one of the first was a young girl I would say under 7 years of age sang a song she wrote in memory of her grandmother who lost the battle. Then their was a father who wrote a song about HOPE in memory of his daughter who passed away only a few months ago. If you have never been a part of it you must plan on it for next year it truly is an event you need and should be a part of.
In closing I want to say thank you to all our sponsors who donated things to our team in support of this event, to all those who pledge us monies, and Mostly a huge THANK YOU to all my TEAM MEMBERS, my family and friend for supporting me through this event.
Dad thank you for walking the victory lap and I am so glad you have beaten this disease & I could walk with you. To all our love ones, friends, husbands, fathers, mothers, grandparents, siblings, children, co-workers who have passed away from this disease, you are missed but not forgotten. You will live on in our hearts forever.
Cancer affects all of us in one way or another at some point in our lives so let’s all keep fighting the battle and lets DRIVE OUT CANCER
Saturday, June 04, 2005
Doing things Differently
HAPPY BIRTHDAY JONAH
So over the past few days or maybe even year I sometimes have moments where I wish I could do things differently. Do you ever have those days? Well the thing most I wish I could do differently is that I had been serious in finding the right person for me, getting married and having a family.
I have watched my brothers and sisters all have children, I am now watching some of my friend’s children becoming parents themselves and thus my friends becoming grandparents and I feel like there is something missing in my life.
If I had done what was the norm I would have been married, had children and now be enjoying grandchildren.
I am now at the age where if this is going to happen, the only way for it to happen is for me to marry a man with children or to adopt. Well lots of single people have been known to adopt but I am not in the financial position to be able to adopt. Because of medical problems even if I decided I wanted to attempt to be a parent it would never work because I just do not have the parts.
So how can I fill that missing part in my heart? Well I surround myself with my niece & nephews, with my friend’s children & grandchildren. I share in their lives and enjoy the pleasure I can from them. My nick name from my niece and nephews for almost 20 yrs this August has been Ant Lex. So now to all those who choose to call me that I allow them to.
I guest there is one advantage to not being a parent and that is pretty well from the time they are conceived until they grow up and move out of the house you have a full time job and commitment to them. If you are not a parent you can enjoy them for the time you are with them and at the end of the day or when you have had enough you can go home or send them home. Who am I trying to kid, I miss all the craziness and activity around my house and sometimes finding myself dreaming about what it would have been like if I had done things differently.
I guess I could get real stuck here if I wanted to but instead I have learned to embrace the time I do get to spend with the special and so treasured children in my life. I really am Blessed by the children I have in my life and am grateful that they love me unconditionally. That they know me for who I am today. So technically I may never be a real mom but I have 8 nieces and nephews, whom I love and adore and they love me right back. I also have 2 adopted pals at the church who are very special boys to me, and right now I have many friends with grandchildren that I adore. I get to spend time with 2 of those grandchildren most Sunday's and I love the special times I spend there playing with them, holding them, sharing with their laughter and silliness.
So am I deprived of motherhood--yes, but the good Lord does provide what he knows we need and he has surrounded me with children.
Would I really do things differently, maybe but in this situation I have come to accept it and enjoy what I do have.
To all the parents who allow me to share in their children’s lives, Thank you. To all the children whom allow me to be in their live I am so grateful and Blessed, Thank you. To all the grandparents who allow me to share in their pleasures of being a grandparent, Thank you.
Finally to God who knows what is best for me and what I can handle Thank you for Blessing me with the children in my lives.
